Life & Relationship Coaching
Product code: RC103
If you feel that you need some help dealing with the reality of your life. If you are struggling in your relationship and you want to free yourself of the limitations of your past, or your current relationship. It is time to seriously think about what you are doing with your life and how to deal with the baggage you have.
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Are you seeking a way in which you can save your relationship?
Discover the thoughts, emotions and beliefs that may be poisoning your relationships with others.
If you are ready to 'get real' and work on you, then these relationship coaching sessions will help you understand how to begin to create firmer foundations.
WHY I CAN HELP YOU, SAVE YOUR RELATIONSHIP: -
One of the most common issues I come across when giving readings is to do with saving a relationship.
Relationships are in the minds of many, hard work. Finding the right partner is hard work. Keeping a partner is hard work. All these beliefs that are imprinted onto us from a very young age, are the foundations we use in our adult life, in every relationship you have ever had, your frame of reference for your relationships has stemmed from your parents or main carers.
Many of the issues we experience in our relationships are a result of the baggage we bring into the relationship without even being aware of it. As the relationship with the person we are attracted to develops, that baggage we brought with us begins to affect our relationships and also your partner's baggage begins to affect the other half of the relationship also.
Having ended a 10-year relationship 23 years ago, I am still very strongly aware of the baggage I brought into that relationship and the baggage my ex brought into that relationship. We had so much baggage we were drowning in it. Often we can make excuses like, we were young, we didn’t have enough emotional intelligence, but you know what? I think it was a whole lot more than that. I believe it was the imprinting of my parent's relationship and his parent's relationship that were the reasons our marriage was what it was and yielded the results it did. The plain truth was we didn't know how to save my relationship.
It has taken a large percentage of my lifetime to realise that if we want to have the ‘perfect’ relationship, we have to deal with our baggage before we commit ourselves to being with another. I have spent a lot of time working on myself, understanding who I am and even to this day, I am STILL working on myself and discovering more of the layers that exist in this complex person I am.
Let me explain about the baggage. My parents were married in the early 1950’s. My father was very much a dreamer, he spent his days in a normal 9 – 5 job to make enough money to pay the bills and in the evening he was an entertainer which was his passion. However, my dad’s entertaining career never went very far because deep down inside, he never believed he was good enough. A programme he had been force fed by his father who often called him useless. His father would never let him do anything, not even change an electric plug. My father never had a father who taught him how to be a man. My father only had a father who told him he was useless.
My mother was also a dreamer, she dreamed of a prince saving her, taking care of her. As a child, my mother had watched her father do everything for her mother. She idolised her father and often had this fantasy image of what her father was. When my father met my mother, he ‘believed’ he had found someone who thought he was amazing. My mother thought she had found her prince. Sadly, this wasn’t the case. My mother’s life quickly changed when she realised my father didn’t have a clue of how to keep a house or maintain it. My mother was the one who had to do the gardening, the decorating, just about everything. She kept house all day, and when dad left the house in the evening to earn more money as an entertainer she sat alone in the evenings.
Over the years the resentment grew, the arguments ensued, but in those days, you had made your bed you lay in it. Divorce was not an option. Mum began to tell Dad he was useless just like his father did. Dad began to fly into horrendous rages, releasing the years of anger he had held in towards his father. The sad thing is, neither of them knew how to save a relationship, neither of them could see their baggage and realise that it was their baggage that was making their relationship a misery. Year in, year out, the same scenes played out, argument after argument, door slam as one parent left one room, after door slam.
It was a horrible environment to live in as a child. As a result, my sister and I were anxious, nervous wrecks by the time we were teenagers. Looking back at my past, the positive side of seeing this drama unfold was that because mum taught me subconsciously I couldn’t rely on men, I learnt to be very self-sufficient. Because my dad was never there, he subconsciously taught me that men don’t show up in my life. I realised my parents never taught me how to love another, they only taught me how to survive.
When I first saw my first husband, I thought I saw a man who was strong, everything opposite to what I thought my father was. Oh boy, how wrong was I about that? I believed, like my mother, I had found someone who would stand up for me, be there for me, because in my eyes as a child, my father was never there for me, he never protected me. In reality, the partner I had chosen was a person who deep down was just like my dad, he didn’t believe in himself. He resented other people’s accomplishments because he didn’t see himself as capable or worthy. His answer to his baggage was to learn boxing and appear threatening so people couldn’t see how weak he really was. His answer to his issues when challenged was to use his mouth, his anger and his fists to do the talking for him.
In my ex’s family, his mother was the dominant one, she bullied his father. His father was weak and lacked self-worth and self-belief. They too had a relationship where it was constant arguing. Neither of them didn't know how to save a relationship. His mother subconsciously taught him, that when you feel threatened you fight. He had witnessed his mother being physically violent to his father. His father taught him on a subconscious level, that all women were second class citizens, only useful for sex and cooking. His father had a huge issue with women and how they should be kept in their place. My husband wasn’t taught how to love, he was taught how to control and survive.
As you can see the combination of all this baggage was dynamite just waiting to be lit. The baggage we have given to us as a child is enormous. This baggage has the potential if we let it, to keep the cycle of dysfunctional relationships going through generation after generation. It keeps us locked into a cycle of pain.
Even as you’re reading this, if you have children, your children are subconsciously learning what is and isn’t a relationship. How you deal with your partner in a relationship teaches them something. How you both deal with your challenges teaches you something. Your view on the opposite sex teaches them something.
A little girl when she is growing up bases all of her relationships on the relationship she had with her father. A little girl’s frame of reference about men comes from her mother.
A little boy when he is growing up bases all his relationships on the relationship he had with his mother. His frame of reference about women comes from his father.
As a parent, I am so acutely aware of how my baggage from childhood, my first marriage and the loving relationship I have with my husband now, may affect them.
Why am I telling you all of this? Because if you want your relationship to work, you have to work out what baggage you're carrying, what it has taught you about relationships, so that you have a chance to have the relationship you deserve and need.
We have to be willing to dig deep and sometimes go to places we really don’t want to go. Sometimes, we have hidden our pain deep down so well, we tell ourselves, we’re over that, and we’ve dealt with it, but the truth of the matter is, we haven’t.
Childhood sexual or emotional abuse, dysfunctional parental relationships, these are powerful factors that shape our potential to create loving, secure and lasting relationships. If we don’t deal with them, we don’t look inward; we always look to the faults and failings of our partner. They do the same.
In order to heal our relationships, we have to be willing to heal ourselves. Healing comes from opening our eyes to truths we perhaps didn’t want to even acknowledge were there. In order to heal we have to be willing to completely open our hearts and release the heaviness, we locked in there. Once we can do that, we can begin to heal and have the love, the relationships we truly deserve.
You have to have the love for yourself in order to attract love. Every human being on this planet is seeking connection, they are seeking validation, they are seeking love. If you can work on yourself, and even better if your partner is willing to work on himself or herself too, you are doing something very powerful, you will discover a relationship where love and harmony are natural. If you have children, you are teaching them how to have love themselves and others. When we can teach our children this, they will have relationships without baggage, they will be able to give and receive love freely and their lives will be full.
I have spent years and years learning to see what can make and break a relationship. The answers to saving a relationship cannot be found in tarot cards or psychic readings. Many of the ‘so called’ relationship counsellors I have met and also visited when I was younger, in a bid to save my first marriage, sought only to blame one party more than another, or kept the couple or person just talking about the problems without giving them any real solutions to their problems. Often many of those counsellors were single and brought their own baggage into their counselling too.
If you feel that you need some help dealing with the reality of your life.
If you are struggling in your relationship and you want to free yourself of the limitations of your past, or your current relationship. It is time to seriously think about what you are doing with your life and how to deal with the baggage you have.
I offer personal relationship coaching sessions to help you deal with your baggage, to help you get to where you need to be in your life.
If you are looking for serious transformation, if you are ready to live a life full of love, joy and peace, then seriously consider the impact your baggage is having on yourself, your relationships and your children if you have them.
Here are just a few comments from clients about my 'relationship coaching sessions' who I have helped in the past.
Reviewer: Hannah Gatcombe from Florida, USA
YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH YOU HAVE CHANGED MY LIFE. I have gone from mouse to confident, happy and fulfilled in this short space of time. I did worry about the cost of the coaching and if it would work, but you have really pulled out all the stops. Since your coaching, I have had the confidence to quit my job and get a better job with better pay. I have eliminated the toxic people out of my life and have a new set of friends who inspire me and support me. I have also lost 40lbs as I began to believe in myself more, I began to be more conscious of caring for myself too. I now devour motivational books. I have also attracted a new partner into my life who values me for who I am because I now value me. I truly truly truly cannot say how much this has worked for me. You are AWESOME!
Reviewer: Madeline Murray from Gainsborough, UK
It took me some time to pluck up the courage to book this but Jill put me at ease straight away. Jill listened and put together sessions that fitted in with my heavy schedule which was helpful. Each session helped me become a more stronger and confident person, it finally has enabled me to say what I feel instead of holding back. It has really changed my life. The cost of this coaching seemed expensive but I was so tired of not being the person I knew I could be. I read books but it didn't help. This method did and I feel at last I can say I am, for the first time in my life comfortable with who I am. I am no longer afraid and I also understand how to let go of the past programming that I wasn't good enough. If you want results and you are willing to do the work this really does work. Jill is so easy to work with and so support it is like getting help from a friend.. I looked forward to our sessions and now feel kind of sad that they are over, but with Jill's help I also now have a better social circle of TRUE friends and that is something money just can't buy.
Reviewer: Susie Kasinger from Alaska, USA
"I have been to lots of healers, taken a ton of classes, did inner child work, read lots of self-help books, listened to CDs, and went on spiritual retreats - NO ONE WAS ABLE TO GET TO THE CORE OF MY ISSUES AND HELP ME HEAL MY EMOTIONS EXCEPT FOR JILL"
Reviewer: Sofia L from South Yorkshire
Outstanding, made you realise your strengths and weaknesses. the needs of others.
Reviewer: Sascha M from Lincs, UK
Gave me an abundance of tools and ideas to implement into various key points of my life that needed a catalyst to help it grow in the right direction for me personally.
Reviewer: T.H. from
I got so much important information which will help me really change my life.
Reviewer: Karen C from Staffordshire
This allowed me to find out what I want in life and the tools of how to move forward. There was excellent training I thoroughly enjoyed the whole experience.
Reviewer: Lyn K from Cambridgeshire
It just was, not quite what I thought, but more than I was aware I needed.
Reviewer: Fiona S from Belper
This has helped me realise that my way of thinking and the time to myself for the last 5 years, ( Jill, thank you for your guidance) has been right. It was useful understanding the patterns in both my parents, which has become part of me and who I am, and have become today. Now I can breathe and the shackles have been removed from my ankles.
Reviewer: Grace D from Belper
I feel I really needed this and that it came along at the right time. It has re-confirmed that I am doing okay and that I need to let go of feeling negative at times.
Reviewer: Rosemary N from Newark
It was very relevant to me. I feel empowered, and I want and need to go forward with lots of changes. It was useful learning about the inner child and how to deal with other types of people. I thoroughly enjoyed the whole experience and want to go forward with self-confidence and with no fear.
Reviewer: Pamela H from Wrea Green
It covered all bases….and goes deeply into family dynamics, learning how to counteract unnecessary conditioning, so you learn who you really are.
Reviewer: Barbara R from Tuxford
It was enlightening, very useful and interesting. It was an emotional ride, and it brought a lot of stuff to the surface, that I had tried to bury. Now I can deal with it.
Reviewer: Yvonne K from Leeds
Jill made me feel more positive. I am at peace and feel more calm. Coming to terms with who I am, that I am an important person, how to deal with all my issues. I know I will succeed. Outstanding.
Reviewer: S. Clayton from Grimsby
I learnt how to know and ask for what I want. To recognise my own needs and go for it. To make a plan and break it all down, so more manageable.
Reviewer: Kathryn R from Wakefield
I now feel empowered to change those part of my life that are not working. I now feel that I have ‘inside information’ when it comes to human behaviour. I have learnt how to formulate a plan to make positive change and reach for my goals. Thank you x
Reviewer: Angela W from Nottinghamshire
It opens many doors and possibilities that I couldn’t see clearly before – wow! The parts I found useful/interesting were seeing the types of people we are, that made more sense of their behaviours better. Big thank you for your vast experience and knowledge that you shared!
Reviewer: Lorraine M from Southwell
It made me face myself and set me on the path of growth.
Reviewer: Elaine B from Mansfield
It gave me an opportunity to explore the possibilities for becoming more empowered in a safe and supportive environment. Discussion & time to explore stepping stones to achieving goals. Tools to help you achieve the things you want. Fabulous!.
Reviewer: Liz G from Sheffield
Jill made me ask difficult questions of myself, in a genuine attempt to clear out the rubbish, so I can continue on the journey of my choosing. Wonderful.
To become good at something you need to be willing to invest time and energy into doing what needs to be done. If you’re not sure you need help, would you do me a favour?
Ask yourself this, are you truly happy with who you are and your life?
Is life giving you everything you want?
Is life giving you everything you want?
If you answered "NO", then let me help you transform that no into a "YES"!
If you have been thinking about 'How to save my relationship', or you can feel your relationship is beginning to lose its magic, let's talk and see about helping you learn how to heal your relationship, how to learn how to love instead of just survive.
90 Minute Session - £150.00 (Discount Available for block bookings)
If you decide to enrol in my coaching programme your first session is refunded in full. That means your first session is free.
Write a review and let shoppers know what you think of this product.
Carol Lennard from Surrey, UK -
Thank you for opening my eyes to the reality of who I was and what I was doing. I had no idea how much I was sabotaging my marriage. I have left it some time before leaving feedback because I wanted to see if it was possible to let go and start again. My husband has noticed a change in the way I relate to him. Not only did your coaching help me understand my issues, you also made me realise my husband had issues he didn't even know he had. I followed your guidance step by step and our relationship is much calmer now. It was difficult at first to go back to my past, I had no idea how much it was harming my ability to live. You made me go deep, deeper than I thought I could but in doing that, something changed. I changed. I am now aware that so many of us are not taught how to love. You have taught me how to love. I am so grateful, because you gave me the tools to heal myself and now I am, without my husband realising it, helping him heal himself too. We laugh and discuss things more now. Like you said it is about creating that safe environment and with love, others will open up to you. Thank you, you have allowed me to take the helm of my relationship and steer it from stormy waters into calmer clearer waters. I couldn't have done this without you and dread to think where we would be had I not found this website. For anyone who is not sure, I would heartily recommend your services. Sometimes we worry about whether things will work, or how much something costs, the cost of a divorce would have been way more than the cost for my coaching with you. The cost of pain on my children, the financial implications and most important of all, the emotional pain for me and my husband. This would have merely added to our growing baggage, as you rightly pointed out. So from the bottom of my heart thank you. Even my husband is now thinking of coming to see you, he has seen how much I want our relationship to work. He has seen how much more understanding and loving I have become, so that is living proof that what you do, does work. xxxxxxxxx